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Coping with losing someone or something you hold dear is one of the hardest challenges in life. Usually, the pain is overpowering. You may deal with all kinds of complex and unanticipated emotions, from shock to anger to deep, lingering sadness. The experience can also affect your physical health, making it a struggle to eat, sleep or even think correctly.
Certainly, all of these are normal reactions. But though there are no right or wrong ways to grieve, there is an approach that helps make everything easier.
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Your grief is just one more reason to take care of yourself. The stress of this experience can easily exhaust your physical and emotional strength. That’s why looking after your physical and emotional needs is important as you go through this challenging time.
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You can try to hold back your grief, but you do that forever. Confronting your pain is critical to healing. If you shun feelings of loss and sadness, you only make yourself grieve longer. Unresolved grief can also cause complications like depression, substance abuse, and health issues.
Tangible or Creative Expression
Expressing your grief in some tangible or creative way helps in processing your grief. For instance, write about it in your journal. If you lost a loved one, write a letter saying all that you wanted to say but never got to; create a scrapbook or photo album of the person’s life; or join a cause or organization that your loved one was part of.
Take note that the mind and body are connected. If you are physically healthy, it will be easier to regain emotional health. You can fight stress and fatigue by sleeping, eating and exercising right. Avoid alcohol and drugs, which tend to numb your or lift your mood superficially.
Hobbies and Interests
There’s comfort in doing all the things you used to do, especially activities that always gave you joy. The more you connect with other people, the less the pain becomes. However, don’t let them force you into feeling this or that, and don’t force yourself either. Your grief is its own, and nobody can impose when you should let go or move on. Don’t be scared of being embarrassed or judged by own feelings. Let yourself cry or not cry, be mad, or even laugh or smile at those small moments of joy.
While resolving your grief and pain, be ready for anniversaries, holidays and other events that can trigger a return of feelings and memories. Most importantly, keep in mind that this is totally normal. Again, face the pain and deal with it, but not without expressing it, whether verbally or otherwise.